it is nw the end of the third wk of my LI.
i gained an experience tt really tested my patience, sanity and my communication skill.
it is difficult, no, make it extremely difficult to be in a world of not your own kind.
i tasted the feelings of being alienated. totally a world of i dn belong thr.
today made me realised how irresponsible a supervisor can be. all he did was to push all the blame to me. for god's sake i DID go to his office the vr first day of my training at 5pm informing him i was going bc. he DID look at the clock displaying it was 5pm and told me tt i could go bc. and today he asked why did i go bc at 5pm??? wtf?! then when the news spread ard the office everyone was like, why did u go bc at 5pm? our time is 5.15pm! walao~ it clearly showed tt whenever i walked out of the office i was transformed into an invisible person. for 3 wks. everyone js kept quiet. and today i was bombarded. by mr shanker. by wati. by everyone.
argh~!!! and all i could do was to 'admit' it was my fault. i was not aware. i kept on saying sorry. for the report is on their hands. anyway, i believe my report is now SCARRED by this fucking incident. to them, it was my fault. besides tt, what was worst, wati questioned me in a harsh tone, (k, she did not look angry but her tone was indeed the kind of u-r-wrong tone) why didnt i punch card for the mth of april? wtf?! (again) excuse me, i started on may 11!!! and the punch card was not even mine!!! it was a chinese name on the punch card and she accused me without even knowing my name!!! jz because the name was a chinese name i got accused for nth!!!
and again, all i could do was to smile and apologised~
(i rmb vr well tt the offer letter did not state my training time. alrite, nw i dn dare to check coz fear tt i rmb wrongly. god, save me.)
i hv no better choice but to continue with the flow and i pray very very hard tt this will end. but. when this ends, it also marks the beginning of another hurdle. another worry tt i hv feared.
graduating
i want to graduate to get my ass out of studying and examinations life.
i do not want to graduate for i fear tt i do not know if i am capable of working.
and the advice to all these feelings, dn wry nw. wry only when the time comes.
enjoy life!
in spite of all falls, i am glad today tt i hv got free lunch, my favourite tomyum (thank you, ah wei), free tiramisu + free coffee bean (thank you, lim) and a happy chat with selina and her roomie, sing ning.
2 comments:
hm...u got ur ways to just smile and hope for the rest. Haiz..i wonder if i would asked back the supervisor and make things clear.
I know ur doubts..but i keep saying the same thing to u over and over again. You really are stuborn. Dont think so negatively.u ald assumed it bad for ur future...why not think something good? think good or bad u stil need to face it. why not happily face it.? positive..remember...
btw...that i like wet tiramisu..keke...hungry..
i dn dare to make approach to the supervisor anymore cos i was warned to keep quiet...
no choice but hv to please him...reports in their hands...
no worries, i learnt smth valuable thru this...
aft the intern, i think i will improve my patience alot...gd training...hehe...
the tiramisu is FOC oso...i dig from ah ngao wann...hee...
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