this is me

true i am drowned deep in depression lately and the smiles i hv got are not genuine. i hv lost myself. the once happy-go-lucky me has gone far far far away...

i was once a positive person. -was-
and now i am trying to be what i was.

the climb is so hard. especially when i look bc at the things i hv been doing. none tt i am proud of. none tt i feel satisfied. none. this drives me into a more negative self.

i jst dn feel right. dn feel gd. it could be my mindset. it could be the people ard me. i duno. i keep getting demoralising remarks. gestures and responses tt dn make me feel gd. all negatives.

blogging is gd. so tt i could channel all rubbish here and fgt abt it.

final yr, final sem and all i could spill is sad post.
hw depressing...

and i effing hate sad post. whr else can i spill then?

if i cont to throw tantrum, everyone is going to stay away.
if i cont to be temperamental, no one is going to stay.

so, is it me? or is it my reaction towards the surrounding?

is kk tt bad? or is it the people here tt make it bad?

suffocation. all i know. for now.